The Visit
One
night many years ago
at
a very difficult time in my life
I
lay down after a hard and exhausting day.
My
mind rumbled and tumbled
over
the days problems for a long while
but
after a time, I feel asleep.
Soon,
my troubles washed away
and
began to dream.
In
my dream, I decided
I
wanted to visit God.
In
a moment, my body lifted
towards
the city night skyline.
Slowly,
I began to journey
first
out above the city,
then
high, high into the sky
out
past the moon, out past mars,
then
faster and faster, in no time at all
I
was beyond Jupiter
then
I was past the solar system
traveling
faster and faster, out into the galaxy.
I
journeyed deep into the night
always
faster, past endless stars.
Soon
I was going so fast
the
stars blurred and disappeared
and
I found myself deep, deep into darkness
at
ever higher speed.
Then
far, far in the distance
I
saw a tiny shining star
and
I realized the star was to be my destination.
As
I traveled farther and farther,
the
light began to grow in size, and I realized
the
only reason it appeared small was because
it
was so far away.
Then
I began to hear a soft hum
far
in the distance.
Moments
later, I realized the sound
was
a woman singing
a
beautifully lilting Sanskrit song.
As
I traveled closer, the light grew and grew
In
seconds I could see it was larger than a planet
larger
than the sun, larger than a solar system
larger
than a galaxy, larger than anything
I
could have ever imagined.
Suddenly
I was there
and
my pace slowed.
I
could see others rising
into
the gold-white light, just as I was
and
I realized I was a soul that was merging
with
a thousand-billion other souls.
Now
inside the light, just as a infant merging
back
into his mothers womb,
I
floated in warm and soft
immeasurable
compassion and kindness.
Perhaps
a moment, maybe an eternity
I
don't know how long,
I
dwelt there as a single tiny drop
in
a vast ocean of love.
After
a long, time I heard a voice gentle and kind
speak
softly to me.
She
said, “You may have whatever you want.”
To
this day, I'm not sure what I said to her
or
how long I stayed.
I
don't know when I left her,
but
in the morning
I
awoke in my room forever changed.
In
the following months
my
thoughts kept returning to my dream
and
I realized my journey had been
inward
as much as it had been outward
and
that the great shining star I had visited
was
somehow inside me
and
outside me at the same time.
I
soon realized as well that if such a place
existed
in me, it must exist
in
everything else that is alive
from
the largest whale
down
to the smallest microbe,
because,
after all, I'm no more special
than
billions upon billions
of
other people and creatures.
I
began to look at everything around me
with
the new eyes of someone
who
had been shown immense compassion
and
could now see it in everything else too.
In
the long years since,
I've
seen many good times
full
of love and laughter
with
those I care about deeply
and
many hard times too
full
of terrible pain and strife
but
even in the darkest hours I've been through
there
always has been silver cords of hope
for
me to hang onto
and
a special sort of kindness that
that
seems to envelope me like a cocoon
wherever
I go.
Every
day that I happen to look for it,
I
can see a subtle pearlescent air of grace
that
permeates all the world around.
The
years have taught me to keep an eye out
for
the unexpected and unusual
and
I've learned that I can find joy
peeking
out of all sorts of places
when
most need it and when I least expect it.
Time
after time, I've had the good fortune to notice
things
that you'd have to see for yourself to believe.
To
this day, I don't know exactly what or whom
I
visited upon all those years ago.
Was
it my soul meeting the universal soul?
I
don't know.
In
the fullness of time,
I
don't know why or how I have been
graced
by the experiences
I've
happened to have had
but
I know what it is to feel joy,
and
I am forever grateful.
Dewey
Dirks
